GRIZZLY PEAR

written snapshots

Category: Penny Delights

  • Inktober ’25, (eight pack 3/4+Magic: The Gathering Arena+Civilization)

    The end of the second week and start of the third weeks the a doldrums of a month-long challenge. Engagement falls off as people slam into reality. That’s why I did it all in September.

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    blunder

    I started by cribbing Arthur Baker’s brush script. I have a hard time with the verticals of his b (skinny at the bottom to wide on top) but that’s gonna take focused practice.

    It will likely take a month of pure brushwork to drill into my hand and brain that the flat brush can make different shapes depending on how hard I press (unlike a steel nib).

    Ultimately I decided to give it another go after getting a big fat hake brush (which also inspired my retake on “sting”). I’m a lot happier with this one than the original blunder.

    10/17

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    10/18

    Ornate

    Three versions of Ornate, the top two different surfaces of the Handwritmic ruling pen, the last one the Dreaming Dogs Aldus ruling pen with a curved edge.

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    10/19

    DEAL

    One of the pieces that went from straight from brain to paper. It still took several tries to get good enough, and of course I still have my quibbles, but I got my fun out of this one.

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    10/20

    ARCTIC

    There are three types of color inversion in GIMP. This one was the “value invert” where colors keep their main characteristics. After that, I nudged the curves to highlight the overlaps to better define the letters.

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    10/21

    rivals

    I had a rough time with this one. Words are inherently cooperative things. The letters patiently stand in line, more or less in teh right order.

    At first, I tried something competitive within the word that just didn’t work. So I settled on gothic, harkening to sports team logos. But that was boring.

    A few days later, I thought of going upside down. The capital R is so distinctive that it still reads upside down, and the flourish on the l makes it read both ways. The upside v is forgiven cause it’s in the middle, plus it resonates in the graph as an apparent capital a.

    So again, third time was the charm.

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    10/22

    Blast

    I clearly have a blast with ruling pen cursive. But this time, print letters felt right.

    Then again, the as lives on the cusp of cursive. With calligraphy, I have finally started understanding the weird cursive conventions that was drilled in 2nd grade (such as the weird-s shape).

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    10/23

    Button

    More cursive, with a circle.

    With any concept, there are still so many little choices in the execution. A medium-small buttOn felt right.

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    10/24

    FIREfly

    More cursive+block text. Even though I try to let each word speak on its own, the line of thought from piece to piece becomes obvious in retrospect.

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    In August, we visited Springs Preserves and my dad let the grandkids play with his SLR.

    I then spent September celebrating an unplanned liver party at UMC.

    I finally took the photos off his camera, which reminded me to dig up my old camera.

    While looking the Nikon D40, the boy asked “so you’re looking for a real camera, like without a phone?

    Cya next time!

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    PSMagic: The Gathering Arena

    Twenty-three years ago I joined my first poker night. It was also my last poker night. It was so fun that I quit on the spot.

    Two decades later, I came across MTGA, getting all the gambling kicks without spending real money.

    Like any online game, there are plenty of ways that Hasbro can steal your cash, but you don’t have to give it away.

    Having been an adult through the rise of social media and freemium mobile game evolution, I see exactly what’s going on with multiple currencies, regular rewards, multimedia stimuli, and daily prompts. Like any sucker, I can see all the warning signs, but it’s so fun.

    It teaches compassion towards the victims of con-men. Many of these marks must know they are onto some bad stuff, but do it anyways.

    We’ll see if this kick holds up after a few months. It’s mega fun, but it’s not building towards anything bigger in life.

    Is the time worth it? I know it’s not. Maybe it’s my subconscious rebelling against the pandemic.

    —September 2021

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    PPSOminous Roost

    I’ve been playing so much MTGA that I need to go cold turkey.

    But first, I brewed my own deck—a case study of why the game is so alluring in an online environment.

    In this game, I love having lots of creatures and things that make them for free. So this card is perfect, since it is all about creating free creatures.

    At first, I started with what I had in my digital collection and added all the relevant cards.

    After playing it a couple times, I realized the concept was workable so I used a couple precious “wildcard” tokens to buy a few extra copies. Then I pushed the deck wide, using a copy of all the cards with the special ability “Disturb” to explore how they interacted together.

    Once I sensed how the individual pieces worked together, I culled the deck to the to the bare essence. In constructed Magic, there are many great cards, but only 60 slots. Once the goal of the deck is decided, it has to be refined.

    This deck tried to build lots of flying creatures to kill the opponent before they killed me. The engine was a couple of card draw / discard spells that would simultaneously create more creatures and build up defenses. For interaction I had a couple surprises to mess with the creatures in play.

    Thus arises the central paradox in deck building. One is limited in engine cards because the engine requires fuel. This deck relied heavily discarding “spirit” cards, but all my engine makers and surprise cards are not spirits.

    This is where the online part of MTGA kicks in. It’s fascinating to slowly refine this deck. The entire library of Magic is at your fingertips so you can tinker endlessly and your opponents won’t get bored because it’s a new player each time.

    With each test, the wicked question comes up. Did my most recent changes improve the deck or was it a lucky card draw?

    I’m not sure. Let’s play again!

    —October 2021, I quit MTGA a few weeks later. It was too obsessive! Four years later, I remember nothing from this deck except what’s written here.

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    PPPPSSid Meier’s Civilization, 1991

    Every decade or so, I get sucked into this game for a couple nights of mindless clicking.

    Of course I played quite a bit when it first came out. And then in Berkeley, Houston, and now Las Vegas.

    This time on an online DOSbox emulator on the Internet Archive (a legit site, I’ve donated to them in the past). But I must be getting old—I got a bad headache and I’m still hungover the morning after.

    Like much of my entertainment, I stick with what I know, so I’ve only played the original version. It’s just the right balance of challenging but actually pretty easy.

    I always focus on a high infrastructure strategy, going heavy on research, connecting all my cities by (rail)roads. Once I have an edge, I defend with strong military unit and buy off cities with an army of Diplomats, strangling the other civilizations.

    You’d think it gets boring, but a little randomness keeps it fun, just like Hollywood recycling the same formulas to entrance the world for a century.

    Coda: I got sucked in for a second night. Fun enough, but not the best use of February 18-20, 2022. Now I need to avoid this program till 2032. Maybe I’ll finally try out Civ II (1996).

    —February 2022

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    PPPPSPractice

    March 2025

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  • vials

    The boy gave me three vials filled with colored water. She followed behind, shooting photos with a wide angled lens. I’m not sure what they were scheming, but they were giggling the whole time.

    I can’t believe how quickly time flies. Last year, work was grinding down my body and psyche. Fortunately I only had three weeks left before jumping out to the airport.

    I was trying to do right for the Division on the way out, but it was time to decouple.

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    We played Marco Polo at home

    Marco’s white cane was
    a roll of old drawings.

    She started next to the bed
    I walked circles around Marco
    until cornered by the bathtub.

    He cheated,
    hiding in the closet,
    standing on the toilet.

    Never said Polo!

    Finally caught,
    he grabbed Marco’s shirt
    and followed her around,
    a little red caboose.

    We finally made him Marco
    He squinted, not blind,
    swinging his cane as a baton.

    Ouch!

    —August 2023

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  • wolves

    Last summer we visited the Big Bear Zoo. It was HOT! The wolves thought so too.

    There were actually three in the exhibit and on this platform, but I needed two, so I picked this photo. It was a moment of wonder to be half an inch from these majestic animals.

    While viewing the wolves, the kids named them Sesame, Vanilla, and Cloud. So the full name of our wolf stuffy from the gift shop is “Rocky, Sesame V. Cloud”.

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    Two little fish harass the shark.

    My arms clap like a crocodile—clap! clap! clap!

    Eeeeeeee!—they jump off the boat-bed into the carpet-ocean, only to race back on deck.

    They hide under boxes—he can’t eat a turtle!

    The second they step out, this shark drags them into the deep, black bathroom.

    Clap! Clap! Clap!—I stalk the cook in the kitchen.

    Nooooo! we must rescue Mama!

    —2023

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  • finger

    After months of craziness at work I picked up the pen to draw my hand again. As the pen meandered across the page I was impressed with the magic of marks in 2D turning a white sheet into hint of fleshed out reality.

    At the time I was also one story from finishing Calvino’s Cosmicomics, thanks to M. E. Rothwell ’s encouragement to pick up the book.

    A few weeks later, I picked up a new badge and swiped in at the airport.

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    I forgot lunch at home.
    No matter, I keep sardines in my desk.

    Mama had a bright idea.
    She came to the park near the office.

    They played on the structure in the golden sun.
    I ate my lunch at 4.

    Homeless guys surveyed for cigarette butts.
    One coughed.

    The boy slipped off the steps and cried.
    Blamed his sister.

    We lectured about personal responsibility.
    He moped.

    They drove off to violin class.
    I worked till 8 (these four day weeks run long).

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    —2/20/2025

    Hat tip to Hazel Burgess who encouraged me to try blind contour drawing!

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  • zoom

    The girl grew out of her car seat onto a booster seat.

    Time goes fast!

    As soon as she was in the booster seat, she had another growth spurt, so that’s gone too.

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    Headphones and Piano Bench

    She grabbed my headphones,
    Put it on, pulled out the microphone.

    Dragged the piano bench into the study—
    A newscast.

    Two high back chairs
    And a wooden board to complete the set.

    She interviewed
    Her brother.

    Next morning,
    He filled cups with blocks.

    Juice
    (sorted by color).

    A new café
    On that piano bench.

    As I yammered on,
    Wearing those headphones.

    2021

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  • yacht

    I have a weird work schedule so I sleep in my own bedroom. When my mother in law stayed with us, I moved a mattress into this loft with half of the kids’ books. It’s so cozy that I’m still here.

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    One summer morning in 2021, we played in the five-foot side yard, hiding from the sun’s brutal light.

    We just bounced a red ball back and forth.

    He stood in the middle to intercept the ball.
    She threw it over and around her brother.
    I just tried to keep it from devolving into pure pandemonium.

    In that moment, I realized this was a once in a lifetime event. It was so out of normal, this wasn’t going to be repeated.

    A few minutes later, breakfast was ready.

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  • xyris

    Last May, I finally walked the arroyo in the neighborhood. The gravel gully led to this very concrete channel where plants insist on taking root in every available crack. I now regularly stroll thorough this arroyo, feeling the microseasons. It’s my path of centering.

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    This afternoon we walked a couple loops around the local elementary school. The second time, boy decided to ride his bike. He swept circles through the parking lot, his teal jacket basking in the golden haze of an almost setting sun.

    This is a time of utter chaos that will eventually reach us 2,400 miles out from its epicenter.

    But today was a perfect day.

    As I’ve matured, I’ve realized that we never get to live our dreams (life is much too mundane for our wild imaginations). That’s OK, this dour realization has freed me to savor such fleeting moments.

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  • relocate

    This kitchen table continues to serve us over twenty years through six abodes.

    This afternoon, we thoroughly cleaned up lunch (cod, broccoli, and rice).

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    It’s been four months since I posted the letter “Q”.

    These hand sketches were photographed last year, so it’s just a matter of tidying the images and writing a little journal entry to mark the passage of time.

    I started the year hoping to catch up on the backlog—let things go, either out to the wild or into the private archives.

    Hopefully I now have the mental space to do this work.1

    Of course, there is a fresh set of sketches to scan. And tiny poems . And those zines that I slammed together twenty months ago.

    One step at a time.

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    1. To repeat myself: if you’re unsure about staying at your current job, it’s time to leave. ↩︎

  • Forty Years Animated

    We have limited screen time for the kids, and they have been spending it slowly working through all the free episodes on Pokemon TV. I’m very close to canceling our Disney+ subscription, but here are some goodies from the past few few months.

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    Elementals, Peter Sohn, 2023

    • Another forgettable Pixar movie. Two months after watching it with the kids, I remember almost nothing from the film.
    • But the visuals are cool.
    • All I remember are everyone else’s opinions — the overblown negative commentary when it came out, the reaction that it’s actually good, and my kids enjoyment.

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    Spirited Away, Hayao Miyazaki, 2001

    • The train scene is one of my favorite moments in film. Beautiful, slow paced, fully earned.
    • My personal preference still lies with Isao Takahata (My Neighbors the Yamadas and Pom Poko) and Whisper of the Heart (Yomshifumi Kondo, 1995), but this movie is the Ghibli masterpiece. So good that Mama and I talked about watching movies together as a family more often.
    • Over the years, I had developed a silly notion that Spirited Away is ponderous. It is slower than blame western animation’s junk food freneticism, but it earns every minute. Each frame is gorgeous and no time is wasted. It’s paced perfectly.

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    The Nightmare Before Christmas, Henry Selick, Tim Burton, Danny Elfman, 1993

    • Watched it again for Halloween, I suspect this will be a annual tradition.
    • Music, visuals, and story all still great.
    • Last year, I suddenly noticed Mr. Burton’s cuddly spookiness everywhere. I wonder what it feels like to be an artist who has visually conquered a holiday.

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    Mickey’s Christmas Carol, Burney Mattinson, 1983

    • As I remembered it from growing up. Fun like The Muppet’s Christmas Carol, but shorter. But we haven’t found our Christmas movie yet.
    • The boy kept counting how many ghosts were in the movie.
    • The Scots got a bad rap in this film.

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    colors
    sing
    lines
    dance
    animate
    worlds
    breathe

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  • happy holidays

    Instead of the usual everyday magic, here is the holiday card that I posted onto Facebook for my friends.
     

    For the past two years, I’ve been hassling the family to take a hike in the hills above our house. Once you get up the slope, it’s an easy jaunt down the old mining road.

    About a half a mile in, you come across the foundation of an old building. I have no idea about its original purpose, but it’s now a canvas for graffiti artists and a delight for the occasional wanderer.

    The kids jumped around this colorful place as the sun set behind our heads, bathing the Las Vegas strip with a golden orange aura.

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    While cleaning up our PC desktop, I found a photo from our visit to Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego at La Jolla last March.

    This was quite the treat because Vegas regrettably is short on art museums.

    It wasn’t easy to wrangle two young kids around high priced pieces of art; the guards were not amused. But after years of not seeing high art, it was so totally worth it.

    With a location a block away from the Pacific ocean, this museum was magic for sure, though hardly “everyday”.

    Here’s to finding magic throughout the new year!
     

    A five year old dangerously close to a Peter Alexander sculpture